Saturday, October 25, 2008

4 Years

Happy Bananaversary, babe! There's no one else in the world I'd share this wild ride with. xoxo

Sunday, October 5, 2008

The Newest Littlest Hatton, or Back to Square One

Miriam Binah Hatton, born (9 days late! Induced! This kid would not ever have come out on her own, I'm sure of it!) September 19. Labor felt like the biggest cheat: I was induced, got an epidural, slept for a few hours, woke up and pushed for about 25 minutes. After pushing for 4 hours (!!!) with Delma, this was a walk in the park. This time around my own favorite OB was there to deliver, we had a great nurse... the whole time I was pushing, Josh, our doc and nurse were all kibitzing and chitty-chatting and swapping funny stories, they barely even noticed I was in the room squeazing out a baby. It was a genuinely fun time. Crazy. Plus, I got a fresh new little baby in the end!

This pregnancy was tougher than when I was pregnant with Delma. I was way sicker in the beginning this time, plus I didn't have the luxury of just going home after work every day and falling asleep on the couch since I had D to take care of. And that miscarriage I had last fall messed with my head and heart and left me feeling constantly, accutely terrified about losing this baby until she started moving around a lot in the 21st or 22nd week. It was maddening. I did have a comfortable 2nd trimester, but then like clockwork, the instant my 3rd tri started, the fatigue set in and kicked my ass and left me feeling like I could barely function.

My due date was Sept 10, and I stopped work at the beginning of that week, thinking that I'd be having a baby any day... But she would not budge. So I had almost 2 weeks at home, getting my head into at-home-mommy mode. I'm really glad I had that time to get work out of my head and to more easily transition from Business Analyst to Fulltime Mommy.

So far so good, though I'd forgotten how hard it is just to get out of the house with a breastfeeding newborn. She gets hungry at the most inopportune times, and then takes a massive crap that shoots straight up her back and needs a full wipe-down and wardrobe change... Oy vay. I'm finally starting to get the hang of it (again), though.

And I get to kiss this face to my heart's content.

Thursday, October 2, 2008

Delma: 25 Months

Delly, this has been a very exciting month. You became a big sister! You are so sweet to the baby, always wanting to give her toys and blankets and binkies. We had no idea how you would respond to sharing our attention with a new crying baby, and had braced ourselves for the worst, but you've been great. Some more tantrums, and those that you do have are even more high-pitched than usual, but we're getting into a rhythm now.

I am just astounded by your language skills. You still use little toddler phrases, but you also aften use complete sentences that seem so advanced to me. I love having little conversations with you. You have a good sense of humor and can usually tell right away when we're joking with you and you'll laugh and tell us we're silly. You're also very aware when we're making jokes at your expense now though, and you get sensitive and feel slighted. We keep forgetting that you understand everything and you're not just our little baby plaything anymore. You're a little wonderful person with feelings that need to be respected.

Every day or two you have new toys/objects that you get obsessed with and attached to and that you bring everywhere with you. Usually they're your stuffed animals or toys, but there have been some random things, like craft projects from school. For several days it was a construction paper bear glued to a wooden stick, with googly eyes. You brought it everywhere, slept with it, had it sit next to you in its own chair at the snack table at school... That bear got the crap beaten out of it, lost an eye, and by the end of its reign as your favorite plaything it was covered with tape to keep it intact. When we were in the hospital having Mimi, Nonnie and Grandpa were with you. You were all in the car together and you tore the arm of your bear and demanded that they fix it immediately. They had to make an emergency pit-stop to buy tape and re-attach its arm STAT. Tragedy narrowly averted. Now it's still sitting in your room, but you rarely even give it a second look.

So far the Terrible Twos are actually not so bad (knock on wood!). When it's bad, it's really bad, but the good times are really really great. You're so fun and you're such a great little person. The first night I was in the hospital with Mimi, Daddy went home to stay with you so that he could be with you when you woke up and keep your routine as normal as possible. I've loved Mimi since the moment she was conceived, and as I lay there in the hospital all alone with her I loved her with the instictive mama-lion love that parents feel for children. But still, it was so hard to be with her instead of you... That baby was a virtual stranger to me. My love for you is this complicated tangle of pure unconditional love mixed with the comfort of knowing you and knowing what to expect from you, and having our routines etc. So much of my life is filled wih little bits and pieces of you, my days are colored by you and your moods and your antics. That night my heart literally ached for you. It made me realize how much of my time with you recently had been spent just trying to deal with and manage you, instead of relaxing and enjoying you. It was a good lesson for me and has completely changed the way I spend my time with you. I think you've responded to that too, and it's made our time together much more fun and playful. We're having more fun than ever, and it just keeps getting better and better!